God of the Mountain and the Valley

 

Do you remember the fuller brush man? As a child, I remember this door-to-door salesman that sold brushes and other cleaning products. I thought that the name Fuller had to do with the fact that the company sold cleaning products.  (Actually the company name was from the Founder, Albert Fuller.)  Fuller is an occupation—or at least used to be. The person who was a fuller was responsible for cleaning and bleaching fabrics. A Fuller cleansed cloth of oils, dirt and other impurities. I share this with you because in the translation which I just read, the word fuller isn’t translated. In verse three we read about Jesus’ appearance, “his clothes became dazzling white, such as no one on earth could bleach them.” The Greek actually says, “such as no fuller on earth could bleach them.” Even those who were responsible for bleaching cloth couldn’t have made it as dazzling white as what Jesus robes looked.

         Here on this mountain top, with just the three special disciples, Peter, James and John, Jesus’ appearance makes clear who he is—He is divine. If his appearance weren’t enough, there are Elijah and Moses with him. These two had seen God face to face. Moses was one of the most revered of Old Testament figures and Elijah who was taken up into heaven without dying. Here Jesus stands with these two and it is clear WHO Jesus is—he is the divine one.

         Now, whatever we think about how this took place, clearly the disciples—as typified always by Peter—are not sure what to make of it. We are told that Peter did not know what to say, because they were so terrified. Now, this fearfulness wasn’t just ‘afraid of the dark.’ This was flat out terror like from watching a horror movie.

Most of us when that terrified are struck silent—we can’t think of the words to say. But, not Peter. Now, I believe a good rule of thumb, if you don’t know what to say, don’t say anything! But that is not Peter. Peter is never one to waste an opportunity to say something inappropriate. What Peter says next as NOT the right thing at this time. Peter wants to build dwelling places—for all the heavenly figures here. But, then the voice comes from the sky, “This is my Son, The Beloved. Listen to him.” In my mind, I hear God saying, “Peter, you don’t know what you are talking about. Please, just listen to Jesus!” And the next thing Jesus said to the disciples was to keep this experience to themselves until after he had risen from the dead.

         When I look at this story as a whole, there are a couple of messages that I take away from it. The first is that when we experience Jesus’s divine presence, we can be so overcome by it, that we fail to really listen to what Jesus is saying. We’d rather build a memorial – a dwelling place and just gaze on the spectacle of Jesus rather than live out the words that Jesus has said. And the other message is probably the more important to me right now: the Jesus who stands on the Mountain in dazzling white robes, is the same Jesus that walks down into the valley with us.

         Our temptation, like Peter’s is to believe that we are only close to God when we are on the mountain top. And so we have to try to build dwelling places where that divine God can stay. If you have seen pictures from the Holy Land, or traveled there yourself, you know that there are elaborate, beautiful structures that have been built in the places where Jesus was. The church of the Nativity is built where Jesus was thought to have been born. The church ofthe Holy Sepulchre is built on the spot where Jesus was thought to have been crucified and then buried. When we so enshrine Jesus in a sanctuary, we may be so overcome with Jesus’ appearance, that all we do is gaze at the portrait of Jesus that we have made. We no longer LISTEN to him. We can be so concerned to prove that Jesus is divine that we don’t live into who Jesus has called US to be.

     I would venture to say, that the vast majority of Christians have not had the kind of experience that Peter, James and John did. We have not seen Jesus standing before us in dazzling white robes. If that is what it takes to believe that Jesus is divine than we are all lost. Yet, it is often more in silence, and not spectacle that Jesus reveals himself to us. This knowledge of Jesus as the Divine, the Beloved of God, is something that comes to us when we most need it. The Jesus who stood in dazzling white robes didn’t come down the mountain looking like that. Jesus came as one of the common people. Jesus lived among those who were most forgotten in his time. Jesus wasn’t just the God of the Mountain, he was the loving savior in the valley.

      In my own spiritual life, there have been moments, that I might call spiritual mountain top experiences. But, those have been far fewer than the valleys that I have traversed. My valley experiences far outnumber the mountain top ones. Most of us live our lives in the valley. Yet, we really want to live on the Mountain, don’t we? Recently, I read about a young woman’s experience climbing a mountain. She was prepared for it. She had trained for it. She had dreamed of doing it. But, ultimately, the conditions were too difficult and she had to abandon her climb. That made me think about how few mountains I have climbed. Getting to the top of a mountain is not easy and it does take training and practice.

      In our spiritual lives, this is probably true as well. We have to practice our faith—spend time in bible study, in meditation and in prayer, in listening to God, in worship. When we practice our faith, we are draw into those mountain top experiences. However, most of us don’t live on the mountain. Our day to day living is mostly spent in the valley. For most us, the valley is where we live. And that is where I experience Jesus the most.

      Sometimes, we think of the valley as a dark and sad place. We think of the words from Ps 23 which says, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death.” The valley isn’t just about suffering and death. The valley just happens to be where most of us live.  Now there are deeper valleys at time, where we feel that we have fallen into a pit. At those times, we might feel abandoned by God. We might find ourselves struggling to get out of that place. And in those times, it is not very often that the dazzling Christ that stands before us. Rather, it is then that we can listen again in silence for the whisper of Jesus telling us of God’s love. It is the Jesus on the mountain, who walks with us in the valley. Whether you are finding yourself on a mountain top, or in a valley, I invite you to listen more closely for Jesus.

     We are about to begin the season of Lent, this is a time of spiritual listening and practice. May you find a way to truly honor the 40 days with a practice that brings you close to Jesus by listening for his voice.

     I want to close with some of the words from a contemporary Christian song—you may have heard it. God of the hills and the valleys.

I've walked among the shadows
You wiped my tears away
And I've felt the pain of heartbreak
And I've seen the brighter days
And I've prayed prayers to heaven from my lowest place
And I have held the blessings
God, you give and take away

No matter what I have, Your grace is enough
No matter where I am, I'm standing in Your love

On the mountains, I will bow my life
To the one who set me there
In the valley, I will lift my eyes to the one who sees me there
When I'm standing on the mountain aft, didn't get there on my own
When I'm walking through the valley end, no I am not alone!
You're God of the hills and valleys!
Hills and Valleys!
God of the hills and valleys
And I am not alone!

 

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Let us pray:  Loving and Merciful God, who does not leave us alone, help us to feel your presence whether we are on the mountain, or in the valley.  Thank you for the mountain top experiences when we feel your Holy Spirit and see you before us so early. May they nourish our spirits in such a way, that we are empowered to walk through every valley. Lord, help us to remember that you are the same God, whether we are in moments when we feel close to you, or at the times when we feel far removed. Draw us closer to you each day. help us to truly feel your presence in the darkest days.

         Lord, we lift before you all those who are experiencing times of hardship and stress. We pray for those who are sick and suffering today whether it is in body, mind or spirit. May they know your healing touch restoring them to health and wholeness. We especially pray for those who are grieving may they find comfort in your spirit. Loving God, we know that you know the concerns which we each carry in our hearts. Help us to lay these before you that you might be at work in our lives. We ask this in Christ’s name and pray as he taught us saying

Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this Day our daily bread.  And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. For thine is the Kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

Take heart, it is I. Do not be afraid!

 Immediately he made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but by this time the boat, battered by the waves, was far from the land, for the wind was against them. And early in the morning he came walking toward them on the sea. But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, saying, “It is a ghost!” And they cried out in fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, “Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid.” Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat, started walking on the water, and came toward Jesus. But when he noticed the strong wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, “Lord, save me!” Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” When they got into the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

Matthew 14:22-33   

Have you ever seen a ghost? Or have you ever had an experience when you thought you were seeing a ghost? When I was in high school, my mother would often go to visit her parents by herself. They lived about six hours away. She would go for a few days. During one such visit, my father had taken my brother, sister and myself out to an event at the high school. My mother was to return late that night driving home after dinner.

         We came back to our home after dark. There were no lights on in our house. I was the first one in, as we entered the house through the front door and I turned left into the living room. Just as I did, this figure stood up from hiding behind one of the chairs. I was completely started because this person looked like my mother. But, my mother couldn’t be there because her car wasn’t in the driveway. My immediate thought was that this figure was a ghost. I thought that my mother had had a car wreck and this was her ghost in front of me. I began to cry. My mother immediately hugged me and explained that she was just surprising us. Her car was parked down the street.

         I had been terrified by what I thought I was seeking, but my mother comforted me and explained that it was indeed her, in flesh and blood. I can identify with the fear that the disciples felt when they saw Jesus walking on the water in the midst of a storm. He was out of place, he didn’t belong there and surely he was a ghost. Jesus’ first response is to comfort them. “Take heart. It is I; do not be afraid.”

         And yet, Peter’s reaction is to test this—IF it is you, let me walk out there on the water to you! Here in the midst of a storm—with the wind and the water raging, Peter is going to see if this ghost is really Jesus by getting out of the boat into the storm and trying to walk on water! I love Peter! He is so human –so impulsive, so willing to risk things. Peter is the eager disciple—the one that is so quick to rush in and do whatever. Peter says-- If it’s really you, let me do it too!

So, Jesus calls Peter out of the Boat. He simply says, “Come!” And Peter steps out into the water.  Peter must have really believed that that was Jesus standing on the water and not a ghost. I mean, would you step out of the boat thinking that some ghostly being is going to help you walk on water. Or would you have stepped out with full confidence that it really was JESUS.

         But, then, when he sees the conditions around him— the wind and the waves, the storm that was raging. And he begins to doubt God’s Power and presence with Him. And when, he takes his eyes off Jesus, and he sinks into the water. When Peter takes his focus off of Jesus, when he begins to focus on the storm-the waves and the wind—he begins to sink in the water. Peter’s doubt overcame his faith. His fear overcame his belief in Jesus. Maybe he even began to think that this WAS a ghost & not Jesus. Peter gets distracted, perhaps he has that sense that what he is doing really couldn’t be possible… he takes his eyes off Jesus and it doesn’t become possible any more.

Often in studying this passage, we focus a lot on having the faith of Peter—to “get out of the boat” even while the storm is raging. Today, we know that there are storms raging around us. For each of us what those storms look like is different. Certainly, we are all experiencing the storm of this pandemic and we are living in society that is coming to terms with its own systemic racism. Many of us have much more personal storms that are raging: some about employment or lack of it, some about health challenges that threaten our lives, some of us are struggling with the burden of heavy grief.

         In the midst of all these storms, do we only see Jesus as a ghost? Do we only have a faint vision of some glimmering far away form that MIGHT be Jesus? Or are we keeping our eyes on the Very One who walks on water? Are we keeping our focus on the One who can help us weather the storms in our lives, and maybe even walk on water—do the impossible?

         When the first readers of the book of Matthew lived, there were many storms in their own lives, and Jesus was no longer with them. When Matthew penned these words, he was reminding the early church—those first believers, some of whom had probably seen Jesus in flesh and blood—that Jesus wasn’t a ghost. Jesus was real. The Jesus who could walk on water and command Peter to Come to him walking on water--that Jesus was still with them. All they had to do was keep their eyes on Jesus, and not be overcome by fear.

         Now, I have heard a lot of religious folks talk about the pandemic in terms of fear v. faith. People have tried to encourage Christians to meet without restrictions saying it is a matter of faith over fear. In fact, they might even use this passage of scripture to justify their belief. But, I would argue that this is not a matter of faith over fear. It is a matter of focus. Are we focusing on Jesus and what Jesus would have us do?

In this story, Jesus doesn’t tell all the disciples to come on out of the safety of the boat and walk on the water. No, it is Peter who is testing Jesus! Peter is the one who wants to go out there into the water on his own. And Jesus indulges Peter. For Peter it is a “test” of who this Ghost really is. For me, my understanding of this story has grown from thinking it is about Jesus telling us to all get out of the boat and jump into the midst of a storm. Rather, it is Jesus’ love and care for us when we are confused and in doubt about where Jesus is and who Jesus is. Although Peter is the only one who jumps out of the boat, by the end of the story, all of the disciples believe and proclaim, “Truly you are the son of God.”

         Who do you believe Jesus is in the midst of the storms in your life right now? Is Jesus just a “hallow” apparition? Or is Jesus the Son of God—very God to you? The one who helps you weather the storms—the One who is with you THROUGH the storms. Have you taken your eyes off of Jesus or are you still focused on him? Too often we focus on the wind and the waves, we focus on our worry and doubt. But, we are called to center our lives in Christ -to focus on Jesus—on the strength that God offers us through the power of the Holy Spirit with us. Peter could not have walked on the water without Christ’s presence with him. It was when he was distracted by the conditions around him, that he lost his focus on Jesus, that he doubted Christ’s power and presence with him.

         In the midst of all that is raging in our lives, Christ also gives us the strength to walk through the storms. We merely have to have faith in Christ’s presence with us. Through the strength of the presence of the Holy Spirit with us, Jesus is more than a ghost. We must learn to trust in that Presence of God’s Holy Spirit with us. How difficult that can be!!  Look at Peter, he had Jesus standing right there in front of him,  and he took his eyes off of him. We must trust in Christ’s presence with us. When Peter took his eyes off of Jesus he began to sink. When we take our eyes off of Christ, we begin to sink. In order to stay afloat—our lives must be centered on Christ. We have to keep our eyes on Christ!  We have to continually remember that Christ IS PRESENT with us!!

         Remember the words Jesus spoke, “Take heart; it is I; do not be afraid!” When Jesus approached the boat, the disciples thought he was a ghost. But, once they saw Jesus’ power in the midst of the storm doing what seemed impossible—keeping himself and Peter on top of the water, ALL the disciples said, “Truly you are the Son of God” and worshiped Jesus!

         There are storms raging around us, Are you keeping your eyes on Jesus? Do you hear Jesus saying, “Take heart!  Do not be afraid!” ?

 

Prayer:

Gracious God, when storms of our lives rage around us, help us to keep our focus on you. Help us to not lose faith and sink, but continue to look for you – to center our lives in you. Even when storms were raging around us, give us the courage to face our doubts and confusion when we think you aren’t present. When we are doubting, give us the faith to rely on you, and grant us the courage to face our doubts.  We thank you that you do guide us—that you help us to walk on water even when we are afraid of sinking. We thank you for the many blessing that we receive each day even when we are struggling and feel overwhelmed by the storms. We also thank you for the good that you work out of our failings. In the times when we do not focus on you, when we are not faithful, thank you that you continue to be faithful to us. Most merciful God, thank you that you do not abandon us.

         We pray for those who do feel abandoned. Show us the way to make your presence known to them. We pray for those who have lost faith, who are sinking in life’s storms. Give them strength to carry on. Today, we pray especially for those who are in need of healing in body, mind and spirit. We pray for those who have lost someone they love and are grieving. We pray all these things in the name of Jesus, who taught us to pray saying… The Lord’s Prayer AMEN.

 

Are Ashes a Public Statement of Faith?

 "Beware of practicing your piety before others in order to be seen by them; for then you have no reward from your Father in heaven. "So whenever you give alms, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, so that they may be praised by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward. But when you give alms, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your alms may be done in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

   "And whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, so that they may be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward. But whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

   "And whenever you fast, do not look dismal, like the hypocrites, for they disfigure their faces so as to show others that they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that your fasting may be seen not by others but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

   "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal; but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:1-6, 16-21 (NRSV) 

If you, like me, have been on Facebook over the last few days, you have probably been overwhelmed by the number of postings about Ash Wed and Lent!! People are talking about what they are giving up and particularly those that are giving up Facebook for Lent have been posting that they will not be around for several weeks.  People are sharing the things that they are going to do during the next forty days and the things that they are NOT going to be doing, like eating chocolate.

Since Facebook has come along, it seems like there is more PUBLIC sharing of faith-related things.  Maybe it's just because of who my friends are on FB. Although, I have to say, I have plenty of friends who aren't religious that are my FB friends. I wonder sometimes if their feeds are filled with these religious posts...

But, when I thought the opening verse of this passage from Matthew, "Beware of practicing your piety before others in order to be seen by them," I wondered about religious posting.  Do some of us just do it to be "seen" by others?

What about the ashes that you have seen on other's heads today?

Is wearing ashes on our head today is that parading in public?

Like standing on the street corner to pray?

I saw a great quote today though that I want to remember..

"We don't wear ashes to proclaim our holiness,

But to acknowledge we sin."

When I was in college, I would often give up Soda during Lent. And usually, Spring Break would fall during the season of Lent. I sang in a choir of college students and we would go on "tour" during Spring Break, we would visit various churches and perform. After the performance, we would stay in homes of church members. Invariably, when we would get to someone's home, they would offer us something to drink and usually it was "soda." (Now, you have to remember this was in the Midwest-they didn't serve tea-much less sweet tea.)  So it was always Soda...  I would feel awful refusing. I felt like I was refusing hospitality. And then I would want to explain. "Well, I gave it up for Lent."  And then I'd feel bad for acting "holier than thou" by saying I was giving something up. It was a catch 22.

But, how many of our Lenten "give ups" ARE things that are public?

When we make the choices that we are, are we making them for ourselves?

Or for others?  For show?

I came across a really cool posting and I bet you have seen it. 20 things to give up for lent.

Here are a few of the things suggested to give up:

• Impatience,
• Sense of entitlement
• Bitterness and resentment
• Blame

 Those are just four of the twenty...

When I looked at that list, I realized that it includes SPIRITUAL things-things that push us spiritually to be better people. The things listed are qualities that could be sinful.

Keeping a holy Lent has to do with moving deeper spiritually. For me, it has often involved doing something like not eating any sugary foods. But in order to make this a "spiritual" practice, I had to take an extra step. When I would crave a sugary snack, I would say to myself something like this, "you don't deserve that, you are a sinner."

But, what if I were to work on my tendency to blame others? That really is something I should be working on all the time.  But what if during the coming 40 days, I consciously made an effort to do this less often. It's not something that you would see me doing. I wouldn't have to refuse a drink or dessert from someone. NO ONE but me would know what I was working on.

Perhaps that is one way to keep a holy Lent and to keep a sacred space for God to enter in and transform me.

Are you looking for a way to keep Lent Holy?

Here's the link to the post mentioned above:

20 Things to Give Up for Lent

Give up things like:

• Impatience - God's timing is the perfect timing.
• Sense of entitlement - The world does not owe me anything. God does not owe me anything. I live in humility and grace.
• Bitterness and Resentment - The only person I am hurting by holding on to these is myself.
• Blame 

VERY different focus from Nadia Bolz Weber

40 Ideas for Keeping a Holy Lent

Day 5: Take 5 minutes of silence at noon

Day 6: Look out the window until you find something of beauty you had not noticed before

Day 7: Give 5 items of clothing to Goodwill

  

Something geared to Teens:   Weird Lent Ideas that will make you holier

 For those into Social Media:  United Methodist Rethink Church

 Here's how it's going to work: Every Sunday, we'll post a theme that we're asking you to sit with that week. As you think about the questions and images revealed in that theme, share them with us on social media using the # for that week. Perhaps you'll share a photo of how that topic speaks to you. Or maybe it's a Vine or Instagram video you created. Whatever it is, we hope these 40 days of Lent will be a time to open your eyes and heart to what's already at work around you.

40 Ideas for Lent from Rachel Held Evans

Ashes to Action Calendar is a two week devotional calendar that is dated for the 2 weeks leading up to Ash Wednesday but can be used any time. 

Chuck Knows Church A two minute video explainer about Ash Wednesday.

Ash Wednesday and Lent in 2 minutes a short video explainer

Church: A Human Institution

This is an edited version of a sermon I preached on February 16, 2014.  The scriptures for the day were Matthew 5:21-37 and 1 Corinthians 3:1-9.

I grew up in the church with parents who were active church members, and I understood early on that Church is more than Sunday Morning.  My parents were committee members-- even committee chair persons. My father served as Lay Leader as well as Administrative Board Chair, and more than once my mother was Chair of the Missions Committee or the United Methodist Women's Unit President.

When I was in high school though, I got my first “taste” of serving on a “real” church committee.  Sure, I had been a member of the youth council, but that was different: it was full of kids.  In High School, I became a member of the Administrative Board,

as a Youth Representative.  It was an eye-opening experience.  I will never forget one of the first meetings I attended in which  one of the older, long-time members of the congregation

got angry and got up and walked out of the meeting.  I learned that adults don't always act like adults and Christians don't always act like very Christ-like-- even in church meetings.  Or maybe I should say, especially in church meetings.

I think that this is one of the hardest lessons that we all learn: people are people--even in church.  Sometimes we say things we shouldn't.  Sometimes we get angry.  Sometimes we just are not very grace-filled.

We are all sinners.

I heard a wonderful interview with Nadia Boltz Weber, pastor of the the House for All Sinners and Saints. In this interview, she shares some things that she tells her church folks. This is not exactly what she says, but this is the message I took from her:

I am GOING to hurt you.

I am going to say something or do something that hurts you.

I'm going to mess up like everyone else..

but if you leave the church because of that...

you miss the best part... The forgiveness part

If you leave before God has the opportunity to work grace,

you are missing the best part.

What I appreciated is that she said, not “IF” but “WHEN."  There isn't a question.. I will make mistakes as a pastor and I will hurt my church members. I am a sinner just like everyone else.

In fact, anytime, humans gather together in groups, there are some things that “naturally” happen. We call it politics.  Even in church, politics seem to seep into how we do things.

We begin to choose up sides, we pick our leaders, and we start to do battle.

Paul understood this and this is part of what he writes about to the Corinthians.

Throughout, he is trying to say that the church should operate differently!

“For as long as there is jealousy and quarreling among you,

are you not of the flesh,

and behaving according to human inclinations?”   1 Corinthians 3:3

In Jesus' words from the Sermon on the Mount, we have what seems to be three different topics that are covered. First, he talks about being reconciled. Second, he talks about adultery and divorce.  Finally, he speaks about swearing and speaking honestly.

Although these three things may seem like a “list” of how to behave as a good Christian, I would contend that they are all three about being authentic person. And more than that, they are all about how we treat one another.

But, it is not just about how we treat others, it is also about how we think about other persons. Even our thoughts need to be transformed by God's grace. How we think about other people is important.

Jesus says that we will be libel to the fires of hell just for calling someone else a fool!

I think that perhaps this is a good place to say that Jesus is using a bit of hyperbole in this passage, but as Adam Hamilton has said, Jesus uses this exaggeration as a tool so that we will take him seriously; he doesn't expect us to take him literally.

Calling someone a name generates the same punishment as murdering someone?  The point he is making is that we must take our relationships with others seriously.  Even how we think about others.

In this passage from Matthew, Jesus speaks about leaving the gift at the altar and going and making peace with a person with whom you might be in conflict.  This is about reconciliation... about being in relationship with another person.

However, for many of us, we would rather be right than be in relationship!

We care more about “the principle” of the matter than we care about our relationship with the person with whom we have a conflict.  But, which IS more important?

The answer in this passage from Jesus seems to be the relationship!

What is the most powerful example of this?

Jesus on the cross!!

Was it “right” for JC to go to the cross?

Did he “deserve” to die in that manner?

NO! But it was about God's relationship with us.

Sometimes being right isn't as important as remaining in relationship with someone.

I have recently read a book entitled, TheAnatomy of Peace. I highly recommend this book-- READ it, digest it and discuss it!  LIVE it!

One of the insights I gained from this book is quite simple, but one that we often fail to recognize.  When we are conflict with someone, we BOTH think we are right!  Each person passionately believes we are “right.”

When we are in conflict with someone and we don't believe we are in the wrong, we might say, “why should I be the one to apologize when I am not wrong?”

Other times, we are willing to swallow our pride and make the first move, but in our heart of hearts, we may still feel that we are the one being “wronged."

When there is still a conflict within us, our hearts are not peaceful, but they are still “at war.”

Outwardly we might not be fighting, but within us, we know our hearts are not at peace.

So, how do we make peace in our hearts, so that we can offer our gift at the altar?

I think it comes back to the Golden Rule. However, it's not just about behaving toward others as you would have them behave towards you. We also much change our thinking about others. We cannot think about others as objects, rather, we have to come to understand them as people. 

Most of us would probably say, I see people as people not objects!  But, take a minute and really think about that.... how DO you think about others?  When people are very different from us, it can be especially difficult for us to see them as living, breathing individuals with their own thoughts and feelings.  We tend to “lump” people together as a group..

oh, that's how all Duke fans are...

well, every preacher is like that...

When people are "difficult" we say things like, “oh, she's just a mean person” or ”he's always angry.”  When we make those generalizations, it's easier for us to see those other people as objects and not treat them as God would have us.

In The Anatomy of Peace  we are offered some guidance about how we can begin to see others as people and not objects.   (note: much of what follows is from the book, but I don't have page citations)

Once we can find a place where we feel comfortable enough, we can ask ourselves some questions which help us think about how other people might feel or think..

These  are the questions as I would summarize them.

• What are the challenges, trials, burdens and pains of this other person?
• How am I adding to these challenges, trials, burdens , and pains?
• In what ways have I neglected or mistreated this person?
• In what ways have I seen myself as better-than or worse-than this person?
  • or have I thought that I needed to be seen in a certain way?
  • And have these ways of seeing myself obscured my thinking about a possible solution?
• What am I feeling I should do for this person? What could I do to help?

These are not simple or easy questions to answer!

They are questions that force us to think about someone else's perspective. In reflecting on them, we can try to get outside of ourselves and think differently.

There is a story in the book about a young woman named Jenny. She is running away from a drug treatment program. Her parents have brought her there under false pretenses and when they arrive, she runs away into the city. She has no shoes on and it is summer.. the pavement is hot. Two young counselors from the drug program follow her. They give her some room, but at one point they catch up to her and have a conversation. They are concerned about that Jenny's feet are bleeding. They ask if they can get someone to bring her shoes, but she refuses. So the female counselor sits down and takes her shoes off and offers them to Jenny. Jenny doesn't take them, but instead keeps on running. Both the counselors then with their shoes removed, continue to follow her...for another three hours!

Eventually, in the end Jenny makes the decision to go into the treatment program.

What was the point of the counselors removing their shoes?  At the time, they might not have been able to explain, but in the end, they simply knew it was the right thing to do. Sometimes it's not about what good something is going to do, it's about the good that it invites others to do.

Sometimes when we go to someone and meet them where they are, we are enabling them to join us in reconciliation as well.

Sometimes, we have to “go to” the place where the person is with whom we have conflict. It is only when we can put ourselves in their place at their level that we can begin to build a relationship with them.

We cannot go there with the attitude that we are already right and we condescending to their level. We need to have the attitude that perhaps we might be wrong or at least that we can learn something from the other person.

Reconciliation is a choice we can make, but it is a choice that begins in deciding to see others people not objects and that being in relationship is more important than being right.

Now, I would add this caveat to what I have shared: there are relationships that are toxic,

that are abusive and that are completely unhealthy.  There is a lot more to reconciliation than just seeing someone else's perspective. If you are dealing with a relationship like that,

then I think some of these principles are still helpful, but I would recommend some others as well. 

Even when a relationship ends, we can end it in a way that encourages further healing

and we can end it in a way that will only prolong hurt.

I want to invite you to envision two relationships. The first is a good one.. a relationship that is whole and good and sustains you.  What makes that relationship so good? Why is it important?

Now think about a second relationship: one that is important to you but has suffered some damage. How can you see this person differently? Can you hold this person in prayer? Can you offer him or her to God for God's help in healing? What can you do to take action to move this relationship to greater health?

I would like to believe that we can really live like Jesus wants us to and like Paul calls us to,

but the truth is we are sinners.  The church is a HUMAN institution because it is made up of us sinful human beings.  We are going to mess up. We just are.

But, as Nadia Boltz Weber said, if you leave the church because of that,  you miss the best part.

Because it's about God's grace. It's about working through the hurts and moving past the bad times and allowing God's grace to heal our wounds and make us even more grace-filled.

Being Present

“If I can just get through the next hour....”

then, it's all downhill from there!

If I can just get through this dinner with my in-laws...

If I can just get through all this service...

Just Get through it!

Is that really how we want to think about our lives?

Just getting through it?

Susan Worthington, our Day School Director, and I had a conversation right before the Day School Christmas program a few weeks ago and it sounded a lot like this... (and I DO have her permission to share this).

I asked Susan how she was and she said something like,

“I'll be better once this is over-- IF I CAN JUST GET THROUGH IT”

and yet, at the same time we looked at each other

and at the children all around us...

and realized what a special moment it was...

and I said something about how quickly it will be that

her grandbaby Sophie will be grown up!

When I was little, I can remember saying, “i can't wait until.... “

whatever the next 'big thing' was--

my birthday... I can't wait until my birthday

Or Christmas or summer vacation...

But, when my Dad heard me say that,

he would say, “don't wish away the present”

Don't hope so much for “what is to come”

that we miss the 'here and now”!!

What does it mean to be fully present in the moment?

What does it mean to slow down and be present here and now?

For some it might mean getting down on the floor and playing with your child or grandchild instead of worrying about what is cooking

or perhaps it's learning to play a silly video game

just to play the game together..

or perhaps it's sharing an ear bud, so that you can hear the music that's on the ipod or phone.

For, me, it's been learning to use snap chat so that I can see the pictures

that my niece is sending...

Maybe for you it's listening to the same story that your Great Uncle tells..

the one about the time it snowed when he was 12...

that you've heard a million times already...

but, what if you really listened this time.. and maybe asked a question or two...

when we are fully present in the moment,

perhaps we experience Christ around us..

This week, I received a wonderful email story..

it reminded me of an older tale

about a man who is visited by several persons on Christmas Eve

in this newer version of the Story,

the man named George hasn't celebrated Christmas since his wife's death.

He doesn't put up a tree or back cookies,

but he is alone in the service station he owns on Christmas Eve.

That night, he encounters a homeless man who he feeds.

Next a couple whose car is falling apart show up.

The wife is about to deliver a baby so George gives them his truck

while he proceeds to fix their car.

Next, a police officer is shot and he helps the officer

as well as the young man who shot him.

At the end of the night, George is told,

that even though he doesn't seem to celebrate Christmas,

he had kept the spirit of the season about as good as any man.

In being fully present and available to those around him,

George experienced the spirit of the season

and lived it out..

The spirit of the season--

The spirit of Christmas IS the spirit of Christ..

Being Present in the moment is about experiencing Christ's presence in the world.

The Catholic priest Richard Rohr talks about learning to be present in the moment

as a way of learning to recognize God's presence with us..

on this holy night when we celebrate, God With us-- God's coming to us as one of us,

I'd like to share some of Father Rohr's thoughts with you...

in order for us to fully appreciate God's presence with us,

we have to understand that it's about OUR being present.. not God...

God is ALWAYS present with us...

we just don't always recognize it...

Father Rohr says,

“God is present everywhere all the time.

There is not really much point in arguing IF and HOW...

we know that God is always given from God's side,

but we have to learn how to receive” this and recognize it.

Recognizing God's presence in the world is about our being present in the moment...

practicing an awareness of God-with-us

When those first angels at Christ's birth,

They said,

“Glory to God in the highest heaven,

and on earth, peace among those whom he favors.”

peace on earth

good will to all.

We can know God's peace and presence because of the birth of Jesus.

Peace on earth begins with peace within ourselves

when we are not peaceful, the world cannot be peaceful.

And it is through the Presence of Christ that we know peace.

Tonight we celebrate the sacrament of communion,

It is in this that we recognize and experience Christ's presence with us now.

There may be other places where we are less certain of God's presence..

but here, at this table,

we have the opportunity to meet Jesus..

But, are we coming to this table,

thinking more of “getting through it”

so we can at to dinner at Grandmother's house?

Tonight, you might not be asked to share a meal with a homeless person,

or let a pregnant lady borrow your car..

you might not help a police officer you has been shot.

But, you still have the opportunity to be present in the moment

and experience the Spirit of Christ.

May you come to this table,

present in this moment

and know that God is With Us

Emmanuel

the Prince of Peace

GLORY TO GO IN THE HIGHEST;

AND ON EARTH, PEACE,

“GOOD WILL TO ALL PEOPLE”!!